In her book The Charisma Myth: How Anyone Can Master the Art and Science of Personal Magnetism, author Olivia Fox Cabane reveals that charisma is not something you have or do not have, but is based on specific actions that can be learned, practiced, and mastered. Some of these components of charisma boil down to what some might call good manners or socially appropriate behavior. But when it comes to what is socially appropriate, the definition can change from one country or culture to another. For example, when I lived in the United States I was accustomed to casually handing or even tossing business cards to potential clients. I prided myself on being able to make a business card glide across the surface of a conference room table as though it were an air hockey table, coming to rest just in front of the recipient. In Hong Kong where I now live there are protocols for exchanging business cards that would be considered overly formal in the United States. Here, one delivers a business card with two hands, holding the top corners of the card so that the card is facing the recipient and can be read by them as they take the card. The card is also received with two hands, and there are slight bows by both parties. Once a card is received, it is not quickly placed in a pocket, but the recipient continues to hold it with two hands, carefully reading it and examining it. Get the protocol wrong and you can hurt your chances at making a good first impression or worse, come across as insulting and rude. Although strange to me at first, I’ve come to appreciate and even relish this process. But what the proper etiquette is for exchanging business cards is in Argentina, Belgium, or South Africa I haven’t a clue. Being a native of the US and familiar with American culture and social norms, I could easily see why the techniques Cabane teaches are applicable there. As I read Cabane’s book, which I started in the US and finished in Hong Kong, I began to wonder if there are principles of charisma and proper business behavior which are universal. In the US it might increase one’s presence and personal charisma to look into someone’s eyes, but could this be considered improper or rude in another country? Are there standard practices a globe-hopping executive might safely use anywhere in the world, in virtually any country? I went straight to the source and asked Cabane herself. What follows are her top two tips for increasing your charisma, regardless of the country or culture you happen to be in. Tip #1: Presence & Focus When people describe their experience of seeing charisma in action, whether they met Colin Powell, Condoleezza Rice, or the Dalai Lama, they often mention the individual’s extraordinary presence.
Reported by Forbes.com 3 days ago.
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